Miss you, Advocate

I am posting this because I suddenly miss the FEU Advocate and all the press-related issues and crammings. Wah! 😉 I posted this originally at my Facebook account’s note section.

I am packing my things up. every thing i take out in the cabinet and put inside the yellow bag that i brought is a sign that this was once mine, but now, i already have to pass it… cause this is one of the things that could never be permanent.

I already promised to myself that once i took all my stuffs in the office, i am finally letting go of the position that i held for one year… and the organization that took care of me for two years…

It’s now over…

Waved goodbye at the new office (SB114) of the FEU Advocate, thinking when will i be back again—tomorrow? next week? next month? next, next, next month?

I dont have any idea. let fate drive me back…

When SE (yes, still the SE as of press time) hugged me, there i felt something. it seems that i’m not so ready to let go as much as i am ready to face the corporate world.

But then, things cant be like this all the time. i should move on. maybe i just cant let go of the idea that, why two years? why ONLY two years?! apart from the people, i know that ive fallen in love with this organization. i thought im fine, that ill be fine, but i guess not. i guess, it will take time to let go—again.

Advocate came to me so sudden, and now, its as if, all of a sudden, i have to leave.

My mentor has been the key for me to enter this organization. without her words, i would never try. upon remembering such, i came to think about who would i be if ever im not here?

I could be the ‘not confident’ student who goes to school, then go home straight, without anything productive to do or accomplish.

I might be the ‘passive’ friend, who goes with the flow, not vocal about her thoughts.

I would be a ‘self-proclaimed’ writer who wasnt able to publish any work at all.

In short, i have nothing to prove. pathetic.

Luckily, i passed the exam and the interview.

But then, a storm drifted me away from the path where i am heading. unfortunately, i lose the org. fortunately, i had my first article published before the storm came, and it was surprising.

Remarkably exciting, having the chance to go back, i grabbed the opportunity, this time, aiming for more best articles.

Then, the freaking story unfolds as i became a part of what they call as the ‘Dream Team’—EB 11-12

Really unexpected, i just did my best. all that i did was driven by the positivities that if they were able to do it, then i also can.

The Dream Team was never possible without the team itself. EB 11-12 was a true dream, and it is rewarding that we were able to live up to that dream.

For years, it is them, the first group of people that i was open for a ‘family-like’ friendship. with them i experience the fun and sufferings, but never left each other’s side.

A perfect bond where strength and weaknesses are shared and developed, making each accountable to one another.

I’ve said enough thank you’s and sorry’s… i love you’s and ill miss you’s… i guess its enough. enough of the drama.

Still… i will surely miss deadlines, columns, meetings, staff eval (that i never experienced), team buildings, forum, problemsssss, delays, confrontations, laughters, tortures, bullies, harry potter, british accent, overnight at the office, manong guards, lame printer, interviews, feu officials, scs, chants, dance crazes, books, newspapers, working… darn! EVERYTHING!

I guess its goodbye then? see you when i see you… surely there will always be ‘again’…

***
Sneak peak of my last article… (sorry, cant help it! its the gist [more meaningful and more ‘well-written’] of my entire message ^_^)
Growth happens whenever we pass through another meter of success, but having failures does not mean you’re not growing up, instead, it serves as a motivation to strive more. We might cut our heads off, hurt ourselves because we bang on the tree, or burn up like a barbecue as we rush too much on the goal, while running in the temple of life, but still, moving forward is only one hit to the option ‘run again’. Never stop.

JK Rowling once said that it is impossible to live without failing. True to its sense that we all have that special failure that will either make or break our life, with this regard, I won’t forget my mentor’s message for me: “It is not the falling that creates impact but the rising that will make a mark.”

I chose to make my life, picked up the pieces of broken me, and turned it into the most beautiful abstract artwork that the world has and will ever had.

At the end of the day, it’s not about the moments we’ve created but also the moments we’ve shared.

***

Too much emotions, words are just losing its essence cause silence is enough to say it all…

PS.

I now understand your sentiments Jerome 🙂

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